Simple bare necessities.

It's been awhile since I updated, because I needed to take some time off to focus on more important things. Like processed meats. I just got back from Munich and other assorted Bavarian cities, where I ate about sixteen pounds of sausage. Best find: The super-simple hotel room at the Hotel Royal, near Munich's main train station. It was only 159 Euros/night during Oktoberfest, which means it's practically free during any normal time of year. The room pictured must be their presidential suite, because our room was the size of...well, a bed. And nothing more. But it's sparkly clean, centrally located, and the continental breakfast rocks the Alps. Seriously, free bratwurst? Dang!

It's four o'clock somewhere.

There really isn't anything clever to say about tea: I like it. It's good for you. It goes well with assorted pastries. Although in London, it may as well be liquid gold. I mean, 36 pounds for afternoon tea at the Ritz? That's a hefty chunk of change for some smoked salmon and clotted cream. I don't even like clotted cream. A much better bargain can be found at the Bramah Museum of Tea and Coffee on Southwark Street, where you can get afternoon tea for a fully reasonable nine pounds. That includes cucumber sandwiches, a hot crumpet, and cake with your tea. If you'd rather skip the sammies and stick with sweets, a cream tea (scones, cake, and tea) is only seven pounds. You might even be able to afford dinner later!

It's almost morning in Iceland.

I can think of a few million reason why I'd like to be in Iceland right now. For starters, the temperature is only climbing into the mid-50's tomorrow. (Well, they use Celsius, so I guess it's climbing into the elevens.) Also, they're getting 18 hours of sunshine right now, which is fantastic. And last, I'd like to spend some quality time in the Blue Lagoon. It's $28 to get in, 100 degrees in the water, and they have a full menu of spa treatments. Their spa products are also available online -- but considering a bottle of algae body lotion is $61, you might as well just swing for the airfare, no?

Yurtastic.

I also considered "yurts so good" as a headline, but decided it was best to forego it. But how glam is this little yurt in the middle of England's Cornwall county? I love the cozy floor cushions and Moroccan lanterns -- beats my hand-me-down Coleman tent anyday. (And I love my Coleman.) I'm a little leery of the nearby "compost toilet," but it also has a bathtb with a wood-burning water heater, so how bad could it be? Plus, it's only a few miles from the beaches of Port Isaac, Port Gaverne, and Trebarwith Strand. I'll bring the s'mores.

Is it low season yet?

Sleeping in Prague can be pricey. Unless, of course, you stay in your own little studio at Kozna Apartments, owned by the beloved Arcadia Old Town. Then you only have to shell out $108 (tax included) for a two-person studio tucked behind Old Town Square. Hold off until low season, and it's only $80. And once you've sidestepped the astronomical hotel prices, the rest is a cakewalk. Wander around Old Town (free), visit the Charles Bridge (also free) or stroll through the national museum (a whopping five bucks). Yes, wallet, I love you too.

Amsterdam, sans savings account.

Planning a trip to Amsterdam can cause a not-so-mild case of sticker shock, especially when hotels like the Amstel InterContinental are asking $648 per night for a standard king. But it's also the kind of place you could go on a whim, as long as you're willing to turn down the turndown service and forego the pricey financial district. Luckily, in Amsterdam, that's hardly a sacrifice. Some alternate choices: Hotel Hoksbergen (left), on a canal in the Singel area, runs $123 per night for a double. If that's still not close enough to the canals for you, you can always rent the PhilDutch Houseboat (right) for $165 per night. Just pack Dramamine...and go easy on the beer.

My heroine!

I am obsessed with Amsterdam, not for its brown cafes or Red Light District, but because I absolutely must see the annex where one of my all-time favorite books was written. Obviously I'm talking about Anne Frank, but not the version we all read in middle school, which was heavily edited by her father to fit the stardards of decency in the '50s. I'm talking about the fabulous unabridged Definitive Edition, wherein Anne rails against her housemates, lusts after Peter, and is generally bored with attic life. Oh, and she's actually funny. Read it again, I'm serious. Anyway, the Anne Frank Huis on Prinsengracht just got better, with the addition of extra family letters and photos courtesy of Anne's cousin Buddy Elias. The museum is open all year (with later hours in the summer) and costs only 7.50 Euro for admission.

Check back for a post on Amsterdam lodging...

$1,000 or Less: Ireland's Dromoland Castle

I'm not a big fan of vacation packages -- I've often found them to be more expensive than searching for air and hotel separately. But I'll make a big, big exception for the Sceptre Tours of Ireland. So big, in fact, that it lands them on my $1,000 or less list.

The package includes:

- Air from NYC to Shannon

- One night in an airport hotel

- A four-night voucher for farmhouse B&B's

- One royally fabulous night at Dromoland Castle

- A stick-shift car rental

-Breakfast daily

Now, keep in mind that a single night at Dromoland is 195 Euro and a ticket to Shannon is around $575. Ready?

TOTAL: $979

Slainte!

Real barbecue.

In honor of the 7,349 barbecues I'm scheduled to attend over the next few days, I would just like to state that the Weber grill is the poor man's volcano. So if anyone would like to skip all the patriotic hoo-ha and fly out to Lanzarote, just say the word. I'm thinking some pollo and churrasco and maybe a chorizo or two, cooked over geothermic heat. It's not that I have anything against patriotic hoo-ha; I just think El Diablo restaurant (inside Timanfaya National Park; admission 8 Euros) could kick your BBQ's ass, since its grill is liquid hot magma. Keep up with the Joneses, por favor.

Greece is the word.

It's no secret to anyone who knows me that I have an unhealthy obsession with Santorini. It's my holy grail of traveling; I actually have recurrent nightmares wherein I only have 24 hours on the island and I can't decide how to spend it. I guess it's better than dreaming about spiders. Anyway, I felt like I was one step closer to my Santorini dreams when I heard about Oia Castle, a luxury caldera villa that's WAY cheaper than the biggies like Katikies or Perivolas. Rates in October are under $300 -- that's dollars, not Euros. I'm madly in love with the Volcano Junior Villa, above -- I don't know whether to drool over the view or the bathtub mosaic. Sigh.

Of course, this is just my fantasy of the Perfect Greek Getaway. The sensible part of me would/will probably shack up at Chelidonia, a budget-friendly villa with equally yummy caldera views and a much sweeter price tag of around $180/night.